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COOPS Weekly - Life from Kansas #33

Updated: Jan 11

Finished my 3rd class

The class was all about change (and accepting it is as a major part of life). We read two books..."Who Stole My Cheese." & "The Coffee Bean." Both books were interesting (not really my style) ...but I can appreciate the point they were trying make. Change is a part of life and how we embrace is a key to growth. Second straight class I aced the final. Also, second time I got the top grade in the class (but who's keeping track...ha).

Speaking of classes...

I finished my paralegal class.

Pretty incredible. 32 lessons in just under 5 months (the program is geared for 9 months). I qualified for the advanced class with a 95%. The classes are a massive time killer so I want to keep going. I am going to focus first on more advanced criminal law classes. That might have something to do with being in prison on a federal charge but I’m just guessing. (Massive sarcasm).

It was Phil Goetz's birthday

Last Tuesday (the 23rd). We went big. Phil has gotten insanely good at Pickleball. So, we decided to make a pickleball paddle. Its epic...It has all his nicknames burnt into it and a hilarious caricature of Phil drawn on the front. We also had a kickball game ... "Phils 1st annual kickball tournament." (It was an inmate named Sosa's idea). Lastly, we had cheese cake made (amazing some of things we can still do in here). Phil was a good sport about all of it. He is not someone who likes the spotlight...and everyone made a big deal out of his birthday.

Big highlight here. We got Cherry Coke....that ladies and gentlemen is huge. It was also funny. Mountain Dew & Cherry Coke are my 2 favorite sodas. We can get Mountain Dew if we have a visitor. But cherry cokes have not been available until this week. I was at the computer. Matt the Professor walked by and stopped to chat. At the end of each of Matt’s classes he asks if "we have any questions," then "is there anything he can do for us." So, my running joke response is something "Matt can you set up a snowmobile ride." So, he walked by and asked if I needed anything. This time I commented I would love a cherry coke. He told me to hold on...I thought he was kidding so I went back to typing.

Minutes later he dropped a 12 pack of cherry coke on the computer I was on. I freaked out thinking it was this huge favor.... only to find out they are offering it at commissary.... Joke was on me.

Craziest things I have seen/heard at the LPC.

We have the most incredible dogs here. When my dad came to visit, I wanted to introduce him to my favorite Dog named "Duke." My goal was to get him to fall in love with him and try and persuade him to take him home. Luckily, I came to my senses. Everyone kept telling me “You know Carper there are dogs in CA." HA!!! But this dog is amazing. It is fully trained and gorgeous. Pit & Doberman mix...Dark brown...a year old. It comes down with us to work out and although dogs don’t usually like me this one does. I bike a ton and people come down to talk to me about whatever issues they are having. Duke sits next to me on the bike and guards me when people come up to chat...I have to tell him to sit.... Its absolutely hilarious. How cool is that?

RDAP is still shut down.

The issues regarding the phone are a huge deal. Nobody knows what to do. Again, nobody is going to come forward and own it.... I wish I could explain this situation better to everyone.... Inmates basically have two rules we live by:

1) Don’t tell on another inmate - Don't rat, inform, Snitch (for any reason). Someday I will tell everyone the lively debates I have about this issue.

2) Never tell another inmate how to do his time.

Pure speculation about what the dog might look like. This is a brown Doberman/Pit mix but with more Doberman features. The phones touch on both these rules. Although I do not know whose phone(s) they are...If did I could not say anything. And telling an inmate not to have one is a violation of rule #2. So, although I don’t think anyone should mess around with phones...the risk is SOOO is not up to me whether or not other inmates have one. It will start affecting my time shortly and all my dates will need to be moved. If it takes too much time then it won’t make sense for me to continue in RDAP. My FSA credit will catch up and the time I get off for RDAP will not matter (remember we also take 4 months of after care when we are on home confinement) .... although I like RDAP a great deal I will not give the BOP an extra second of my time (nor do I want the obligation after I am released if I don’t need to take it). I feel especially sorry for the guys that are 15/20 days away from graduating. They are furious. Hopefully we go back to programing and can catch up.

We will see.

Fun fact: Did you know the average person reads about 300 - 500 words a minute. How many words do you think the fastest reader in the world reads?

12,000 words per minute with 100% retention.... WHAT???? THATS CRAZY....There is a guy who can retain info seconds/minutes after he finishes reading. This blew me away when I read about this. Fascinating

. (Dad Comment: When I tried to fact check this, I found claims all over the place including some far faster than this.)

Miss everyone. Thanks for the continued support.

Weekly newsletter. week 33
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